On Sharing our Stories Magic, Ruth posts a weekly writing prompt. This week the prompt came as a challenge to write about a sunset without using color or seasonal language yet evoking a sense of both through the story. My mind naturally goes to poetry, so I wrote a poem. In June of 2019, my parents moved to a retirement home, and my siblings and I cleared out their home of 30 years. Even though, thankfully, Mom and Dad are both living healthy lives, the move was like a death. Their home on the lake had become a peaceful vacation spot for me and my family. I mourned this loss in this sunset poem.
The Last Time
You won’t know when the last day comes,
but it will come with a sunset
while you sit in the porch swing
dangling your feet like you did as a child
perhaps talking with your brother.
Hummingbirds will hum at the feeder,
a blown glass ornament your mother left behind
for you to fill
with sweet water just to see their wings
flutter hungrily, hearts beating faster than
the speed of sound.Margaret Simon, draft
The orb that makes each day new
ends this day
in silent symphony
hovering over the lake
bathing it in jewels
you can hold in your hand
lay down in the velvet-lined jewelry box
she left in her closet
for you to find.
Reflections on the Teche 
This is so powerful but your first line resonates with me and my own life….”you won’t know when the last day comes.”….
So true…a keeper
Beautiful! Ruth, thereisnosuchthingasagodforsakentown.blogspot.com
The first line is so powerful and really drew me in as a reader. It also initiates the sunset and changes that are happening in the poem. You have many powerful images. The hummingbirds made me think of how some things stay the same and the comfort we can find there. I’m glad your parents are healthy, but losing a house is hard.
What a fascinating prompt, what a beautiful poetic result! I love the images of the dangling feet on the porch swing, the jewels in the velvet lined jewelry box…loved this! What a sunset!
This is breathtaking. So many lines to love as you mourn a loss. The movement of your feet dangling, to the hummingbird ornament. “The orb that makes each day new” setting and then being held in your hand. Holding on to all that you remember about this place and your parents.
This poem leaves a bittersweetness in my heart. I’m sure it was incredibly difficult to sift through the house and say good-bye.
Love the idea of the sun ending the day in a silent symphony. Beautiful words!
What a hard loss in such a beautiful place. I can see the hummingbirds through the brown feeder and the luscious velvet. I’m also glad your parents are still doing well. XO
This gave me chills. What a gorgeous poem. The first four lines were so visual for me. Captivating. Thank you for sharing your gift of writing!
The line, “you won’t know when the last day will come,” is something I think about in my life. I am sorry that the last sunset in your family home has come, and I wish you many future sunsets somewhere new.
Gorgeous sunset. I love how you captured this moment. I remember needing to make one last trip to my parent’s home before it sold.
Such loveliness. A beautiful tribute to a much-loved place.
I feel it in my heart.
Margaret, you painted beautiful images bringing your family home and love for it alive in this passionate tribute. I’m happy that both of your parents are healthy and alive. Your piece resonates with me because my mother died in August of 2019. I remember how difficult it was to say good-bye to both her and my childhood home. These lines “dangling your feet like you did as a child/
perhaps talking with your brother” brought tears to my eyes. Thank you for sharing and moving me.
Gail, I am so sorry for your loss. In many ways I feel I’ve already lost my mother. First the move and then pandemic lockdown. I need to remember to be grateful.
Thank you, Margaret. Yes, the pandemic has made it difficult to see families. I’m sure you are missing your mother, which is natural and understandable in this Covid-19 world. From what I know of you, YOU are a grateful person.