For more Spiritual Thursday posts, click over to Violet’s site.
Violet has invited us to write about Special Days for May’s Spiritual Journey first Thursday blog posts. Special Days in our family have changed over the years. From those birthdays when I made the cake, sewed the dress, planned the activities to a simple card, check, and a phone call.
My three daughters are all grown and have lives of their own. I’m glad that empty nest comes in stages. I think each stage gets a little harder. When they are gone to college, we still see them on holidays. When they are single, we can call and talk for a long time. But now that there are husbands, family has taken on a new dimension. My mothering is needed less and less. This coming Mother’s Day may be the last when I am The Mom. (Prayers said for grandchildren.)
I have learned that I have to speak out loud about what I want for my special day. This year I’ve asked that we all be together. Being together has come to mean so much. My daughters are best friends. When we are together, my husband says it’s like a sorority. I absolutely love having adult children, and I savor every precious moment with them.
In her book A Maze Me, Naomi Shihab Nye speaks to me in this poem about not only the days of the week, but also the years of our lives.
Necklace
I hope Sunday’s slow and long,
steeped like a pot of mint tea.
Soft sun and deep thinking.Saturday was a crowded calendar page,
a mound of chores.Could Monday be a porch?
Facing the week.
Wednesday a meadow?Thursday, let’s leave
small baskets at everyone’s door.
Flowers, notes, stone.
No one does that anymore.Could a week be strung on a silver chain?
A boat?
A tree?
Tuesday as a tree?–Naomi Shihab Nye
Reflections on the Teche 
Dear Margaret, I love (and can relate!) to this: “I have learned that I have to speak out loud about what I want for my special day.” Your post encourages me to reach out to my (wayward) son today. Thank you! xo
Margaret, I am so delighted that you will be able to spend time with your daughters on Mother’s Day. This year, I have to settle on celebrating Mother’s Day around Memorial Day just because of timing. My son and husband will be with me though but we really wanted to be with my granddaughter to celebrate the generations of love. Special days can be special in different ways so I am pondering that these days.
I love this observation from your husband about you and your daughters: “When we are together, my husband says it’s like a sorority.” And I hear you about loving being a mom to adult kids. This year I’ll be away from home on Mother’s Day but my two kids are far away anyway so our time away with other family may be better than if I was at home and wishing some close family was around.
The dynamics of a changing family are both wonderful and tricky. I love seeing my children establish their own traditions and routines, but it feels a little sad too, especially when I hear wonderful ideas for a new way of celebrating a day or starting a new tradition and realize, it’s too late for me.
So happy you made your wishes known for your upcoming Mother’s Day. I anticipate a very special day for you surrounded by your girls and Jeff. Enjoy every single minute! Next year will certainly have its own new celebratory focus. 🙂
This is so true for our family: “Being together has come to mean so much.” Our three children chose to buy homes next to us and our back yards run together. They have blessed us with 18 grandchildren and I’m so blessed to be close as they grow up. Then our youngest moved to Ecuador about 8 years ago. We are counting down –12 more days– until they arrive and we will all be TOGETHER for three glorious weeks before they must return to their home.
Wow, Alice! 18 grandchildren?! You must be so busy with them all so close to you. Have a wonderful time with everyone together. Blessed days.
Thank you. Who would have guessed from 3 children… Carl and I say we must have done something right. :). In addition to their own children, our oldest son and wife adopted 4 young children with Downs syndrome from Russia and Bulgaria.
Hi Margaret,
A Naomi Shihab Nye poem meditation always makes me slow down,
reconnect with the essential. So glad we share affection for celebration of
theunscripted days. I love her idea that Tuesday is for trees.
Your sharing this poem with me marks a special day, just like that!
Leaving you wishes for a nourishing & silly & nostalgic Mother’s Day this year.
My M. D. 2018 plopped down with a snowball in March, when I was fortunate to
be with my family in travels far from home.
Recently a special day is when I’ve picked rose flowers from my garden & put them in green bottles recycled from our kitchen (olive oil, wine) to leave them, a surprise at the front step, for a brand new neighbor who is struggling with issues. A special day is truly, what we make it, when we make it. Appreciations for reminding us of that. And, Happy Mother’s Day in advance.
I love everything about this comment. Yes, special days are truly what we make it. You spread kindness.