With my gifted kids, I’ve been using Linda Rief’s Quickwrite Handbook. She offers mentor texts and prompts for writing. These mentor text quickwrite prompts give a jumpstart to a blog post. I write with my students. Today I want to share a few responses to “When I was Young in the Mountains” by Cynthia Rylant. Linda Rief wrote “When I was Young at the Ocean” and included many sensory images. We were able to see how using senses in our writing creates strong imagery for the reader to understand. Karson took us to his eye doctor appointment.
When I was young at the eye doctor, I was very nervous. I did not know what I would look like with glasses on. I did not know if I would even end up with glasses! We went to the eye doctor at Lens Crafters in the mall. They called me,” Karson, we are ready for you.”
Karson, 5th grade
When I was young at the eye doctor they had to check my eyes. The room was really small. The light was dim. I sat in a rolling chair like my teacher’s. They made me look at a farmhouse while they took pictures. Then they made me look at a green light. That scanned my eyes.
When I was young, I cried and cried because I did not want to do the thingy where it blows air. The doctor was a woman, and she was so nice, she let me skip it.
When I was young at the eye doctor, I thought I had to dilate my eyes but I also cried and cried and I had tears dripping with sweat because I was scared. But because I was crying, I did not have to do that either.
When I was young at the eye doctor, I eventually got glasses. I was okay with it because I look so cool. My glasses are my friends. They still are.
This summer I had to say good-bye to my parents’ house on the lake. The memories are bringing me back, and writing helps me process them.
Margaret Simon, draft, 2019
When I was a Daughter at the Lake
When I was a daughter at the lake, I swung on the porch swing pushing off from a little plastic stool and listening to the squeak of the chains. Sometimes my father sat near me with his newspaper and a bowl of cereal. He’d look up to tell me a bit of news. “Listen to this!” he’d exclaim, and I’d laugh internally at his total exasperation at the world.
When I was a daughter at the lake, I’d sleep late with no alarm set, waking to the scent of coffee and pancakes, maple syrup, melting butter. Mom in her robe stood near the griddle and greeted me with a smile. “Good morning, sleepy-head.”
When I was their daughter at the lake, worries melted away like the sunset on the horizon. We’d talk and talk. Sometimes we’d sit silently watching the heron fishing. Their presence was enough. It still is.
Shaelon remembered his vacation to Florida this summer. Using the form helped him describe many details of the trip. This is just one of his four paragraphs. The repeated line is helpful in creating a framework for writing.
When I was nine at the beach, we got to the beach.I ran and felt the nice soft sand on my toes.I ran to the water and touched it.It felt warm and soothing.I ran in until it was to my waist.Now it felt cold.I hurried back to the shore and look for my mom.My sister and I sat down on the sand next to my mom and attempted to try and make a sand castle.We had made good progress until the tide came in and washed it away.I gave up and walked along the shore, picking up shells and looking at their beauty.I tried to see if I can hear the water lapping in the shell because my sister had told me I can.I ran back and showed my mom all the shells I had collected.
Shaelon, 6th grade
I will continue to find inspiring writing prompts in Linda Rief’s book. When we study other authors, we discover our own way to writing.
Reflections on the Teche 